In Florida, there’s Disney’s Animal Kingdom, Lowry Park Zoo, Busch Gardens, a Big Cat Rescue, and the freaking Everglades. Let’s just say that between the lionfish, pythons, and gators, we have a lot of wildlife.
And, with Springbreak 2017 right around the corner, I felt the urge to combine the call of the wild with the insanity of being in your twenties. Only animals can understand what it’s like to be you at your age (and vice versa).
Feel Free to use your favorite Planet Earth voice actor to narrate in your head while you’re reading this:
20-Year-Olds: The Cheetah
You’re fast. The world is moving past you at breakneck speed. You have goals, endeavors, and things that you need to accomplish now. You’re envied by those around you who look back in their twenties wishing they had the opportunities and lifespan you do.
Not only can you pursue anything you put your mind to. You also have the speed and agility to move onto the next big thing, quickly. But, remember, just like a cheetah, chasing its prey, once your speed starts to outpace your heart, you’ll need to slow down and buckle down on what you want to do with your life.
21-Year-Olds: The Dolphin
Just kidding about that buckling down thing. You’ve got places to go. Friends to meet. You’re going to be talking to a lot of people. Networking. You’ve got a giant ocean out there to explore. And don’t forget chillin’ with your pod. You have a crew. You talk to them day and night, work with them, eat with them. These people are your BFFs, your mentors, and possibly the love of your life!
But, don’t forget to breathe. You need to make time for yourself. Even if you love being surrounded by a ton of people in the deep, deep ocean called a social life. You need to make time for you.
22-Year-Olds: The Wolf
You’re on the prowl. You might live off of ramen and booze, but you know that eventually, you want to settle down and leave the pack. Maybe, you’re thinking about finding your soul mate, having a few pups, wherever the wind takes you.
You know that’s going to take some planning and a steady job. But, you’re still a loner right now. That doesn’t have to be today.
And, even if you have a pack to take care of, you know that things are going to work out. You have a future. And, you have plenty of time to think about it. For now, just howl at the moon and focus on food, shelter, and your pack.
23-Year-Olds: The Platypus
You don’t know what your purpose in life is. You have no clue what God was thinking when he made you. You know you have a purpose. You have some skills. You think you know what you want. You realize you’re a mammal and then all of a sudden you start laying eggs.
Nothing makes sense. You start panicking when you realize everyone has their act together and you’re still trying to figure out whether you’re a beaver or a duck!
No worries, you’re a marsupial. Because you’re so unique that frees you from the cookie cutter lifestyle everyone has. Make your own rules. And, then follow them.
24-Year-Olds: The Sloth
Your partying lifestyle caught up with you. Late nights howling at the moon, hanging with your flipping friends, and laying eggs have you bent out of shape.
You’re not really motivated to do much. Kind of just existing. Hanging around. Other people are getting into relationships, changing jobs, traveling. You’re just trying to figure out what show to watch on Netflix.
You kind of want to do stuff like them, it just takes you longer to get around to it. Sleep is like this fleeting thing, but you have plenty of time to do it, especially if you don’t have a family or much of a social life.
At this point, the future feels like it’s here. And, now you need to make changes. Slow but steady. You’re going to get to the top. Eventually.
25-Year-Olds: The Horse
You’ve been grazing for a while. Testing out different fields, careers, and educational paths. You have a bit more experience than you did before. You know what to expect with the next years. Family becomes important.
And, making worthwhile relationships matter more than a crew. You might have a few people you still talk to or chill with. You’re starting to grow into your own. You have this new kind of confidence that comes with being in your mid-twenties. If you can fight off a quarter-life crisis, you may be able to survive anything.
26-Year-Olds: The Goat
What happened? What made you so bitter? Everything is just tin cans; razor sharp and meaningless. The relationships you once had have gone sour. Your crew is doing their own thing.
You want a change. You’re stubborn enough to make things happen. The world isn’t going to keep you in its mold and if it has you stuck in a cubicle, eventually, you’ll break out.
27-Year-Olds: The Penguin
You’re shuffling through the last wing of your twenties. Gathering your pebbles. Building a nest egg (it might be a retirement plan or a literal nest). You have some control over your income. Your horizon isn’t as bleak as you once thought. And, once the cold hits, you’ve got other sturdy people surrounding you.
28-Year-Olds: The House Cat
You’ve stopped caring. In a good way. You know what belongs to you. People who come into your life may or may not amuse you. The things you wanted as a kitten no longer matter. If you want to claim something, it’s yours. You can stretch out, and own your lair. Being 28 isn’t like being 20. You can’t compare confidence to fear of the unknown.
29-Years-Old: The Elephant
You remember your past. But, you know where you’re going. Elephants can sniff out water from miles away. And, you know how to make your ends meet by any means possible. You look down at others. With your mighty years of experience, you can take out any challenge. And, yet, you’re humble enough to help the herd and yourself.
If you love animals and respect their purpose in our lives. Then, do the same thing with your twenties. Love them and respect whatever changes may come.
I’m not in my thirties yet, but I wonder what kind of animals I’d expect to become then.
Comment below and tell me if you agree with my choices of animal-likeness. Don’t forget to share this post if you think someone might reflect the creatures I described above, or sign up for the TLM mailing list for more articles like this one.